Love Cafe

I'm homesick - should I transfer closer to home?

March 24, 2017
I’m homesick. My family, friends, dog (CoCo- she’s a chocolate lab!) and all support systems are back home in SoCal so I’ve been feeling really lonely since coming to Cal. I have made a few friends but no one that I really feel connected to. I’m about to end my first year but seriously thinking about transferring to a school closer to home. I would love to graduate from Cal but don’t know if it’s worth the risk of loneliness or my mental health for the next 3 years. What should I do?

What are some tips on making friends while living in the dorms?

October 14, 2016
I live in unit 1 and even though we’ve been in school almost a month, I still haven’t made any friends. I thought living in the dorms would give me a better chance to meet people but it is harder than I thought. What are some tips on making friends while living in the dorms?

My girlfriend of two years cheated on me - how can I trust her?

September 23, 2016
I have been in a relationship for almost 2 years and my girlfriend and I have had what I consider a great relationship. Last week she confessed to cheating while she was home for the summer and I don’t know what to do. I try to be the best partner I can and know that she loves me but I’m mad and don’t trust her and have thought about breaking up. She says she wants to be with me but how do I know she’s telling the truth?

What do I do if there’s conflict in my friend group but I don’t want to get involved?

October 7, 2016
Hi there! Conflicts among friends can be tough, especially if you value all of your friendships and don’t want to lose any of them in trying to save other people’s. First, think about what the conflict is over. If it’s something small, there might not be that much risk associated with getting involved a little bit. Having a mutual friend bring some common ground back into the issue can help a lot. If the issue is very large or you are uncomfortable getting involved, find someone who can.

How do I know when I’ll be ready to lose my virginity?

October 7, 2016
So, to start off with, I’m going to be using the term sexual debut to refer to the concept of virginity, as the term “virginity” tends to be attached to some heteronormative connotations. However, go ahead and call it whatever you feel comfortable calling it, but I personally prefer to use the term sexual debut because I feel that virginity is attached directly to the act of having penetrative sex, while I prefer to keep the concept of sex open-ended, and open to interpretation.

How do I stay healthy in the dorms?

October 21, 2016
Dorm plague is rampant in unit 3. How can I best prevent myself from catching what others have?

I've changed my major so many times already - how will my parents react?

October 28, 2016
I’ve changed my major twice already and am thinking about changing it for a third time. I feel confident that I’m making the right choice this time, my only problem is that I haven’t told my parents yet. They’ve freaked out on me already for not sticking with one major and I don’t know how to bring the conversation up again. I’m nervous because I don’t want them to see me as flaky or irresponsible. How can I talk to them about it?

My roommate and I are on two different schedules

November 4, 2016
My roommate and I are on two different schedules. I’m up early getting ready for 8am’s and he tends to get back to the apartment late- plus, he’s a night owl. He’s gotten upset with me in the past for making noise "too early” and honestly, he wakes me up at times when he’s up late at night. What can I do about this?

I'm a transfer student and I feel like I don't belong

November 11, 2016
Being a transfer student sucks. It’s almost the end of my first semester and I don’t feel like I have made very much progress socially (or academically, really). Any tips?