Crushin Hard on My...Professor?!

February 9, 2018

Student and professor

I have a crush on my professor. What should I do?


Hi there!

Many people at Berkeley, and in college in general, often find themselves developing a crush on a professor they have. Of course, school policy dictates that professors can not be in romantic relationships with their students, for a number of reasons. However, there is nothing wrong with an innocent crush, therefore I don't think you need to do anything! As long as you understand the boundaries of the relationship you have with your professor, a crush is not a big deal.

Good luck!

Simran


It is completely normal to have a crush on your professor! I mean, who doesn't like someone with brains ;) However, I would suggest to not act on these feelings. Because your professor is probably someone who is older and you're a student, it would be best to stay professional and friendly. There are often policies at universities like Cal that prohibit this type of relationship. Sometimes it's better to just admire from a distance instead of going for it, especially in a situation involving a professor who has superiors. Telling you to not like your professor would not be helpful. Feelings are inevitable, even if they're good, bad, or just neutral. Just be mindful about the setting you are in and the implications of any actions. For now, I think it may be best to hold off on doing anything rash. If anything (if you're actually wanting to be in a relationship or some sort), you can try out a dating app to see if there is someone else that you can possibly meet. If you're not looking, then try to distract yourself by spending less time (if possible) around your professor and more time with close friends :) Maybe even try out a new club or sport! Good luck!

Angela 


I think that by law, instructors (be it professor or graduate student instructor) are not allowed to have a relationship with their students for the duration of the time the student is enrolled in the course. So keep this in mind, and do not take personal offense if the professor does not show any reciprocated interest. Also, I think it is good to be realistic; there may be barriers besides just age that could make forming a relationship difficult. If your crush is more of an infatuation for your professor and is negatively impacting your learning, you may want to consider talking to other staff members of the course and see what can be done. But there is nothing wrong with harmless admiration!

Best,

David

 

There is absolutely nothing wrong with having a crush on anyone, including a professor. But you should understand that acting on such feelings can have consequences for the professor. Many universities have policy against such unprofessional relations during your term in the class; consequences can include the professor being fired. Of course being patient and avoiding all policy barriers, a relationship with a professor is a relationship like any other. If they're available and it's mutual and consentual, then that is your choice to make!

Shawn